A Christmas Poll

by Bernard McCormick Tuesday, December 24, 2013 No Comment(s)


We live now by polls. We are reading polls about elections that are a year way, and about polls on candidates who are not even candidates, and may never be. It might be a wise idea to have everybody who is interested get together every so often and stand in a line to circle the name of the person they would like to have as president of the United States or school board member, or head of the National Polling League. Just do it one time, and we would not need weekly polls.

We once thought the late humorist Art Buchwald lacerated polls forever when, during the Vietnam War, he commented on a poll among Americans on the subject of bombing Hanoi. Some people favored bombing Hanoi, some were against it, and some had no opinion. It was silly, Buchwald wrote, to ask Americans about bombing somebody else. Why not poll the people actually being bombed in Hanoi? So he did. The results were that 40 percent of the people in Hanoi enjoyed being bombed, 35 percent disliked being bombed and 25 percent had no opinion. Those numbers may be a bit off because Buchwald is gone and can’t be polled on the subject.

So it is with Christmas. On the eve of that international holiday (or holy day), some people object to an international holiday for just one religion, or rather one religion that has hundreds of sects, thanks to malcontents such as Martin Luther and Henry VIII. Others object to the people who object to Christmas, especially when they oppose religious symbols in public places, or insist on using the term “holiday tree.”

We haven’t seen this week’s poll on the subject, so we will make up our own numbers. One hundred percent of people are in favor of Christmas presents, if they are on the receiving end. Of those, 65 percent don’t mind them being called Christmas presents, 20 percent prefer holiday presents and 15 percent have no opinion.

With that, have a merry and sober Christmas holiday.

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